to desire the replica

Who am I?

Is me......

Is me......

Well, to be blunt, I’m a bitch. Or that is at least how honesty is labeled these days, and I am, if nothing else, honest. I’m cranky and augmentative, prone to drinking too much Keith’s India Pale Ale & smoking far too many cigarettes. I’m fiercely loyal, obsessed with my dogs, and with anything that smells of lavender or sage. I also crave banana splits regularly, but always buy a hot caramel sundae when I get up to the counter. I don’t know why, I cannot explain this.

I write to stay sane.

I write to stop myself from saying out loud some of the things that I think.

I write because if I don’t, I fear that my head would explode and then who would feed my dogs?

I do a lot of freelance writing & web copy & though I enjoy these outlets immensely, most frown on the use of the word fuck and other such profanity, even when its usage isn’t gratuitous. I’m not saying that I swear a lot, I am however saying that if a sentence calls for the word dirtyratfacedmotherfucker, I want to be able to write dirtyratfacedmotherfucker.

You know?

I will still jump off of the cliff just to see what’s at the bottom and I will still kiss until my lips are raw. I will write things that will embarrass me later, but will be glad to have done so.

I will always go down swinging and be the first to volunteer to lick the spoon. I will rarely take no for an answer and have absolutely no interest in which designer made your purse. I have been known to act out in social situations. i am the kind of girl that waits until she’s 40 to get married and then does it in secret by eloping to the beach. I like things to be sneaky.

Sometimes I yell in my backyard for no reason. When I am a passenger in a car I prefer to look out the back rather than the front window because I tend to leave things behind.