to desire the replica

posted on: July 30th, 2008

No pressure….. Just the first post ever on repliderium.com. This one will set the tone for the whole good goddamn blog, so nothing to be nervous about really. I’ve been sitting here for a while debating how to begin and while doing so I’ve consumed the majority of a jumbo sized bag of licorice. My first blog post will forever remind me of the cloying scent of red licorice vomit.

Fanfuckingtastic.

Ok. So here I am. Both liberating & paralyzing to realize that unlike my web or magazine gigs I am able to write whatever the hell I please. Makes me wonder which of my friends I will inadvertently offend first. (Please let me know as there is a small wager on the line.) Today, with the unfamiliar sugar high coursing through my veins, I shall leave this to a simple introduction between us.

(Me) Hi. How are you?

(You) Fine thanks and you?

(Me) Kinda pukey, but otherwise alright I guess.

(You) Glad to hear it. Good luck with the blog.

(Me) Hey thanks! You’re a swell friend. Oh, and thanks for the flowers.

(You) You’re welcome. You deserve them because you’re a super fantastic chick. Really, you are. Don’t doubt it for a second. And you’re hot too- great boobs.

(Me)We didn’t rehearse the boob part. Great ad lib, but do I have to pay more forthat?

virginity lost

virginity lost

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Stever Says:

No probs. That’ll be an extra $100.

kthx

Kim Says:

Check is in the mail!

Richie Rich Says:

you do have very nice boobs…

… um… i mean…

I AM OFFENDED!!!

Leanne Says:

Do you really mean We and You can say what ever we want?

………..FUCK………

hmmm, that felt good.

Leanne Says:

Oh and I’m also offended……..FUCK

stan Says:

back to the diapers and just shit in general… why does it need to stink so bad? (the only exception to this is Kim Holden, whose shit rarely, if ever, stinks. In fact, in many countries it is used as a muscle soreness remedy, worked into the muscles similarly to Ben-gay or Rub A5-35. Occasionally it finds use as a leave-in conditioner for tangled and unruly hair - and it is supposed to be great for split-ends.) Can someone please tell me is stinky shit a product of evolutionary selection or is it just pure dumb luck?

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