to desire the replica

posted on: May 21st, 2010

It’s Friday of the May long weekend.

Hallafuckingluya.

Oh, and I have left over Chinese take out for lunch today.

Does it get better than that? Really, Does it? I don’t think so, amigo.

It’s going to be hot here and I intend to spend a large portion of the weekend laying prone on a quite strip of beach while the dogs roll in the sand and goose shit. Despite my best efforts to towel them off upon return home they will manage to keep a nice slimy wad of goose crap hidden from me and will merrily¬† wipe some of it on the couch and throw rugs. Afterwords they will look proud of their offerings. I get why dogs do this and I get why cats drag in dead mice and birds- really, I get it- it’s a gift. Can’t we somehow teach these little fuckers to colour or make clay ashtrays? Why do their prezzies always have to smell like death and lumpy yogurt? Or like the one time that Maggi rolled in a giant pile of vomit in the park. Human vomit. With carrots and what looked like maybe enchiladas? Yeah, that was nice.

We still have our little homeless old man Nigel. It will be a week tomorrow and not one single personal has called me, the spca, or the pound. No one is looking for him. I hate the owners of this little dog with the fire of a thousand suns. Unless it’s an old person who had a medical emergency and he escaped during the ambulance chaos. Then I don’t hate them with any suns. In fact, I kind of have to assume they’re dead. RIP former owners of the dog now called Nigel, I will make sure he is safe & loved.

I have to go eat the left over Chinese in my lunch now. Never mind that it’s 9:21am. When spicy Mongolian beef calls your name, you answer motherfucker!

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Jeannie Says:

Yay for long weekends! Especially May 2-4. The queen of long weekends.

Have a great one. And ^5 for loving Nigel.

Kim Says:

;)

misterwah Says:

hahaha… “with no suns.”

I like your writing.

Kim Says:

Why thank you mister! (Add courtesy here)

Just so I have this straight: It’s NOT okay to roll around in vomit? Maybe that’s what I’ve been doing wrong all these years.

Stever Says:

Minnow, I believe that would be the root of all of, or most of, your problems in life.

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