Pre-long long weekend (Thanks Jebus!) My brain is a little fried and I will therefore do a TMI Thursday post highlighting one of my mother’s shinning moments. Yes, that’s right, I’m about to embarrass my mother and then go straight to daughter hell. I will see some of you there.
For anyone new here, my mother is her own personal gong comedy show. She’s a forgetful, ridiculous hippy that is ok with public embarrassment for a laugh. Examples of the aforementioned traits; When I lived in Europe she moved and forgot to tell me. When my brothers & I were small she took us to the zoo & shoved a rather large turtle in her purse to take home for us. When I finally got my period at 16 years old she brought a bright red cake TO MY HIGH SCHOOL.
So….You get the gist of my mother. She is a little wacko. No, she’s totally wacko. Today’s story takes place many years ago on the main drag of Kelowna. It’s a busy city with an over populated downtown core that sits right on the edge of an enormous lake. (Read as- unlimited witnesses.) After running her various errands, my mother jumped into her car which was parked nose in from the street (I forget which car she had at the time but all throughout my life her vehicles were very mechanically suspect and looked alarmingly homemade) Unintentionally throwing all caution and common sense to the wind, my Mother often drives with one foot on the dashboard, as was the case on this particular day. She started the car, planted her left foot on the dash, put it in gear and stepped on the gas with her right. Unfortunately, the gear she chose was first rather than reverse and the car promptly jumped on to the curb and smashed into the Royal Bank with a fair amount of force. Most parents would be horrified. June however, is not most parents. She found it hysterically funny as though it were a failed bank robbery attempt. The more she thought about it the harder she laughed and seeing pedestrians and bank employees rush out with shocked and frightened expressions just made it even more amusing. The bank manager tried to get some basic information from her (Are you ok? What’s your name?) but the more he inquired, the more uproariously she laughed until she finally peed her pants right there in the car.
They had to call an ambulance but not because she was injured. They called it because they thought she was an escaped lunatic.
My mom rules.
